Sympathy's Requiem

A young man in a war zone, the sidekick who helped him get through the day, and a plea for help.

Over the past couple of weeks, I've been among a group of authors communicating with Ahmed Hatim, an 18-year-old boy in Khan Yunis. Ahmed's father's leg is injured, so it's difficult for him to walk. Because there's eight mouths to feed, Ahmed has become the man of the house, doing what he can to make sure his family has food and water. Up until recently, he had been creating Instagram photos and reels of what life is like for him in hopes of getting people to donate to a fundraiser an Italian girl was running on his behalf. It had been going about as well as you could expect, until last week, when Ahmed went to the hospital for ongoing treatment for the flu. At the hospital, the person he had been trusting to charge his phone decided to steal it that day. Now, the only way Ahmed can communicate with anyone is by hopping onto his sister's phone late at night.

Her phone is on its last legs.

Ahmed is scared, which is understandable. It's a lot on his shoulders. There was a time when he went to school and harbored dreams of buying his own laptop so he could learn computer programming. There was a time when he'd come home from school, take a nap, then play on his phone for a bit before meeting friends for a pickup game of soccer. Ahmed plays attacker. I imagine him on the pitch mimicking the moves of his favorite player, Al Nassr's Cristiano Ronaldo ("He's skillful, tall, fast, legendary," he tells me). Now, so much of what he used to have and be able to do is gone. No house. No school. No sleep. No playing or watching soccer. No phone now. No Instagram anymore because he tried to access his account from his sister's phone and Meta shut down his account. And food is hard to come by.

I wonder sometimes about the mark this war will leave on him, should he be lucky enough to survive it and start a next chapter with his family. But I realize I'm getting too far ahead of myself. Ahmed is in a day to day fight to have his and his family's basic needs met. Palestinians like him who fear being killed or badly injured while getting aid, are scrambling for cash (which they get after handing over forty percent of the total they need) to pay for food. Sometimes the cash doesn't come. When it does, I worry about Ahmed walking around, possibly alone, with it in his pockets. He tells me not to worry. I tell him I can't help it. He reassures me that he's usually with walking around with his friend. That friend, Hudhayfah, was a 23-year-old in Ahmed's shoes, doing anything he could to help his family, and Ahmed too. Hudhayfa was killed on Tuesday as he tried to collect his dead grandfather's body. His name means "little buttress" or "one who has sympathy" and he certainly seemed to be helping Ahmed keep his chin up day after awful day.

"It was bad today," Ahmed told me. "I lost my friend. Nobody cares about us except a few. I've lost a lot. I hate loss. I cried for the (Al Jazeera) journalists we lost this week. They were the ones who carried our voices to the world."

Another writer spoke to him after this, and she said Ahmed rarely sleeps but told her that he was going to sleep because he was so tired. With Hudhayfa no longer at his side, and conditions increasingly difficult, I am asking you to please help by donating to Ahmed here at this link . Thank you so much.

Writing prompt: Write about a friend who helped you keep your chin up when times were truly tough.

“I learned a long time ago that there is something worse than missing the goal, and that’s not pulling the trigger.”

-- Mia Hamm

Endnotes

What I'm reading

Solidarity: The Past, Present and Future of a World-Changing Idea by Leah Hunt-Hendrix, and Astra Taylor. Why I picked up this book is probably self-evident right now. The world is a divided mess, and I wanted to be thinking about times in history where people have come together for the common good, and ways in which we can cultivate this practice. It's a really engrossing read, written by two activists with a track record of building grassroots movements.

And...

This poignant New Yorker story about a mom and her trans teenager who left the country after Trump issued an executive order that restricted access to gender-affirming care for minors.

And...

This Guardian piece about the 15 best literary Substacks, which, for authors is "a way of getting new work into the world, whether publishing a novel in serial form or hot-off-the-keyboard short stories; for others, it’s a way of interacting directly with readers...or still others, it’s a home for criticism, journalism, personal blowing off of steam, self-promotion, or a more direct version of the traditional writerly side hustle, teaching creative writing to aspiring authors." Hit reply and let me know who you follow on this list, and what you love most about their missives.

What I absolutely can't wait to read

It Girl: The Life and Legacy of Jane Birkin by Marisa Meltzer, which comes out on October 7. This is the first comprehensive biography of the actress, singer, human rights advocate, and style icon. And it also seems like it has been one of the hottest advanced reader copies to get right now, so I am super-jealous of everyone who has already been able to read it. I just love, love, love Jane Birkin so much.

What I've been watching

"Sunday Best: The Untold Story of Ed Sullivan" on Netflix. To be honest, I think this documentary was rolled out recently and without a ton of fanfare. It's a shame, because it's really, really good. The film portrays Sullivan in a light I hadn't considered. He wasn't just that stiff guy who introduced The Beatles to the U.S. He booked Black performers like Harry Belafonte, James Brown, Mahalia Jackson, and the Jackson 5 during the civil rights era, even when he was threatened with the loss of advertisers for his show. You can't help but wonder what Sullivan would say about Stephen Colbert, whose show was cancelled by CBS recently. Why? He spoke truth to power, and in the Ed Sullivan Theater, to boot. So definitely check this one out. It's a timely one.

Where I hope you'll donate this week

Yes, please donate to Ahmed if you can, as often as you can. Or find another family to help on Chuffed. There are so many in need. Thank you.